This is just a reminder to myself, primarily, that I have to start writing again here. Currently I'm occupied with catching up on composing a number of pieces; it seems my thoughts have been getting in the way of my work. A substantial portion of these thoughts concern Facebook, what I thought I was going to achieve, and what I hoped people would discover about me, my thoughts, my interests and my concerns, mainly about my art form, the arts in general, and socio-political thoughts. I guess I need to express my ideas and feelings so as to clear my head. I'm really beginning to see that what I think or how I feel about things, not unlike most people in this world, doesn't amount to a plate of mashed garbanzo beans. And I'm gradually coming to terms it. It's not easy for me as a composer knowing none of my musician "friends" (now there's a paradoxical phrase: musician friend) are willing to do my music. And that can be explained in a number of ways:
1) The obvious, I'm not well connected in the musical world, mainly I haven't been part of academia since my graduation from college.
2) At this stage of my life: who gives a shit about some non twenty-something or younger? The music world, classical or pop, is, just like the fashion industry, youth obsessed. This actually carries over the job market in general. If I never hear of some recently graduated college person complaining about the job market, it will not be too soon. Two words: Spoiled Brat. More about this another time.
3) Then there is the intrinsic disingenuousness of musicians in general, especially those who have achieved a level of success. Disingenuous, that's a nice way of saying lying bastards. They come in two categories: a."Oh love your music. I'll put it/them on my Spring/Winter programme schedule," and then never hear from them again. b. No response at all. Not even an acknowledgement of receipt, whether I e-mail or post it in dead tree tree format. Basically this tells me I STILL don't exist, or worse, I do exist, but my music isn't worth the effort, and I in my quintessential musician's passive/avoidance behaviour, won't tell you.
4) Not unrelated to the third: I don't have money. I have found that musicians make the occupation of street prostitution look like a call to the priesthood. Musicians will do anything, ANYTHING (did I say anything?) as long as you got the bucks (Glass, Reich, Higdon, Ades, Dougherty, Wernick, and a host of others). What! playing something because it has musical or artist value? Pffft! Who are you kidding? It doesn't matter if he or she is successful or not... let me correct that, the more successful they are (just as in any business) the more complacent they become and, therefore, even more disinclined to try music by someone they have never heard, or heard of. How easily we forget.
Oops! I hadn't meant to get into this. I guess this is the first rant on this. I'm not done. I'll be curious if anybody reads this.
Anyway, I plan to post my ideas and thoughts here and then share them on FB. I'll have more to say about my Facebook plans in the future. Right now I have to get back to work.
